


A Reason to Quit and Effective Methods

by MarchWindsAprilShowers



Category: One Piece
Genre: Drug Addiction, Fluff, M/M, Recovery, the tiniest bit of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-08 08:46:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15926936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarchWindsAprilShowers/pseuds/MarchWindsAprilShowers
Summary: Sanji knew he was an addict, but he didn't realize that the people close to him knew it as well as he did. Usopp, captain god sniper genius, comes up with an over-the-top plan to never have to see or smell another cigarette again.





	A Reason to Quit and Effective Methods

Out of breath and patience, Sanji ran himself into the crows nest which doubled as Zoro’s workout room. He quietly shut the door behind him as his first thought to slam it shut would give his position away. Pale fingers worked to lock it just as gently before he ran to the nearest window, obviously looking for  _ someone.  _

“What the hell are you doing?” His arch nemesis barks at him. “Dude, this is the one place where I don’t have to see your stupid eyebrows. Get the-” 

The cook shushed him loudly before grey eyes went back to scanning the deck below. He looked relieved, his shoulders sinking comically as he relaxed. To top it off, he dramatically pressed his back up against the door and pulled out his much loved cigarette box. Then hands went back into his pockets for his lighter, frantically lighting up one of the cancer sticks as he slid himself to the floor.

“Oh  _ no.”  _ Zoro says dangerously, marching over to the persistent dartboard. He was holding something behind his back, Sanji only figuring that it was one of his stupid swords. “You’re  _ not  _ smoking that shit in here. It’s the only place on this damn ship that doesn’t fucking  _ reek.”  _

And before the addict could retort or even plead to just have  _ one  _ smoke in peace, a colorfully painted gun was pointed directly at him. 

“Usopp knew you’d run in here. He’s the smart one, remember?” He smirked evilly. “So, he told me to give you this just in case.” 

Sanji didn’t even have time to brace himself before cold water soaked his shirt, putting out his cigarette. As he looked down at the third shirt he put on today in frustration, he could hear the triumphant snickering from above. It was the worse sound to ever hit his pale ears, and probably enough to make him quit right then and there. He cursed. 

“Aw, shit, man! It was totally worth you coming in here and ruining my workout!” He held his stomach, wheezing as if it made him weak. “Dude, just go. Go and try hiding somewhere else. Wait! Before you fuck off somewhere, no come on, I just want to let you know that...whatever revenge you’re plotting for me, it’s all gonna be worth it.” 

The door was slammed in the swordsman’s face. 

Usopp was calmly sitting cross-legged on the edge of the deck’s railing, fishing pole steady. He was bored, even with the water gun within reach, fishing was still mind numbing to him. Without a coconut or abandoned box floating in the ocean to shoot, he settled on his pocket sketchbook. It probably wasn’t a good idea, as he can easily lose himself in what he’s drawing by unconsciously blocking out the world around him, but it was  _ something  _ to do. It would be a while before they docked anyway.

“My darling,” He hears over the small scratching noises his pencil makes. He almost rolls his eyes. “The king of the snipers, the god himself, the captain above all other captains-” 

“What do you want?” Usopp drawls, setting his chin in the palm of his hand that he propped on his knee. “Look, if you want me to stop spraying your suicide sticks out  _ then-” _ He held onto to the word just to see the glint of hope in his lover’s eyes. “-you’re going to have to outsmart me or stop smoking.” All that hope crashed and  _ burned.  _ “You and I both know the first thing isn’t gonna happen.” 

Trying not to let the sniper flatten his resolve, “I came here to make a truce or a peace treaty or some shit.” 

“Well, I  _ was  _ thinking about something like that.” The sentence makes Sanji’s brow raise. “And Chopper, although supporting my efforts, gave me some valuable information.” He says, getting up from his spot and walking over to the older man. “It’ll be easier for you to quit smoking by weaning you off it instead of just stopping cold turkey.” His hands reach into his lover’s pockets, pulling out the infamous box. “So, I’ll be in charge of these. You can have  _ three  _ for today.” 

The cook smiled and held out a grateful hand- 

_ “However,”  _ Which sounded like a warning he better heed. “If I find out that you had more, you’re gonna get it worse than just a water gun. Understand?” 

“Does that mean we have to give these up!? Cuz I’m gonna keep it!” Luffy yells from afar. “I’m keepin’ Zoro’s too!” 

“Why mine?” Zoro asks a little softer. 

Usopp heaved a sigh. “I knew it was a bad idea to give him one.” He grumbled, before getting back to what he was doing. He put the three cigarettes into a pale hand, and he didn’t look to happy about it either. “Go smoke. I’ll let the army know to cease fire.” Before he turned away to give the command, he rocked up on his toes and planted a kiss on the older man’s cheek. “I...I worry about you, you know.” 

Sanji was left standing there kinda stunned, kinda turned on, heat rushing to his cheeks. He was tempted to throw all of his cigarettes into the ocean, but that would only piss Chopper and his lover off because of the sea life that could be harmed, etc. Too bad that they’re both cute when they’re mad. 

Maybe quitting would be easier than he thought. 

And maybe he should have quit a long time ago. 

He really should have. 

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo! Long time, no read! I've been moving and have had a bunch of family shit going on so I'm just getting back into the swing of things. This story is coming from a very personal place. I have a very close family member of mine who has been smoking all the time that I've known her. The water gun method is one that I've fantasized using, and I think my brother has used it on her before (but she still smokes).
> 
> If you are a smoker, please, please, /please/, quit. If not for yourself, at least for the people around you. If not for the people around you, at least for yourself. You're better than your addiction and you can overcome it. It will be hard and it will feel like you're not making any progress, but even the tiniest of steps lead to the greatest of leaps. A support network, like the Strawhats, are a tool that can help you immensely. 
> 
> If you're thinking about smoking, DON'T DO IT EVER. NOT ONLY WILL IT DESTROY YOU FROM THE INSIDE IN THE MOST UGLY WAY POSSIBLE, IT IS INSANELY HARD TO QUIT. If you think smoking is cool, NOTHING CAN BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH. SLOWLY KILLING YOURSELF WILL NEVER BE COOL. IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU'RE A WOMAN LOVING COOK WHO CAN KICK ANYONE TO THE MOON OR SOMEONE STUCK IN A RUT. SMOKING DOES NOT EQUAL A BOOST IN CHARACTER OR EVEN THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF FINESSE.
> 
> That is all! I hope you enjoyed the story!


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